Warts and all ...

Since I'm trying to keep this as honest as possible (so I can look back and see how much progress I've made in a couple of weeks or months!), I will admit today was a rough day with a few bright spots.

I woke up feeling sort of in a funk.  I was pretty anxious about the allergy symptoms I'm experiencing - a slight rash on my face - I saw my doctor about it in Chicago before I left and it had gone away.  I was feeling pretty hopeless about a remedy because everything is different here - the detergent I wash things in, my sheets, my towels, the water, etc.  So I decided to go to the pharmacy to try to get hydrocortisone cream for my face and for my itchy bug bites.  Every kind of medicine is behind the counter in a pharmacy here, so you have to talk to the pharmacist to get most medications.  The plus side of this is that pharmacists can actually give you medication that normally requires a prescription in the US, and for many things, you can just go to the pharmacy instead of to a doctor.  Anyhow, I went in and explained to the woman what I wanted.  I wrote down "Hydrocortisone" and said I didn't know the word in Spanish, but this is what I wanted in English.  She looked totally confused and I managed to pull the word for "itchy" out of nowhere and showed her my bug bite.  She immediately understood and came back with a little box of "hidrocortisona" - not sure why "hydrocortisone" so confusing!  Anyhow, she gave me instructions for how often to apply it and sent me on my way.

I then made my way to the yarn shop which was totally packed.  But I found some beautiful green merino wool yarn, and a pair of circular knitting needles I wanted for a project I'm hoping to start soon.

Finally, I went to the grocery store.  After today, I've realized I either need to shop exclusively in the smaller shops, or try to go to the big shop when it's not the weekend.  It was packed.  And the lines at the meet and fish counters were long.  I was about halfway through the shop when I was looking for cleaning supplies and suddenly I got panicky.  I'm not sure if it was a full blown panic attack, but it was awful and I felt like I was going to pass out.  And/or die.  Not that I'm dramatic at all.  I managed to calm myself down pretty quickly (I sort of crouched down in an out of the way area and tried to breathe deeply - it worked).  I continued on with my shopping but I was still feeling pretty anxious and really, really frustrated with myself.  I just couldn't understand why I was so panicky - nothing in particular made me more anxious than normal (although I'm sure the crowded store and my general anxiety about speaking Spanish didn't help).

I eventually made my way home, made myself lunch, took a nap, watched tv and read.  I spent a lot of the morning sort of beating myself up for not going out with people today; although, now that it's rainy I'm happy with my choice.

In retrospect, I'm also pretty proud of myself for making it through today.  I did a lot of scary things (talking to the pharmacist, for example).  So, I panicked a little - no big deal, right?  I'm sure my morning anxiety did nothing to help me.  Hopefully, if it happens again, I can keep myself calm.  And if I panic, I'll survive.  I'm fine and feeling totally normal now, so I know what to do if it happens.

In other news, I watched some Spanish television - most of what I've seen so far is horrendously bad.  There was a show that is sort of like Jerry Springer.  I found the Spanish version of Ugly Betty "Yo soy Bea."  They also had the tv movie about Prince William and Kate Middleton dubbed into Spanish.  It's really trippy watching dubbed things because the actors mouths are no where close to being in sync with the audio.

Finally, the power went out very, very briefly this afternoon.  I used that as an opportunity to reset the clock on my oven (which I couldn't figure out how to reset).  But now the oven isn't working and seems to have no power.  So tomorrow will require a visit to the doorman downstairs.

Sorry for being a downer today - hopefully tomorrow will bring a more sunshine-y day all the way around!

Errands

I had a lot of fun last night and got to meet a lot of new people.  I'm a little sad because the guy who was leaving (another postdoc) and his girlfriend both seemed like really nice people. It's really too bad they're leaving!

Today is going to be errands day.  I was thinking about going to a cider festival and then a music festival with some friends - but it's supposed to rain in the evening, so being outside for a festival doesn't sound great to me.  Plus, I've been having some allergy issues since I got my bug bites (plus another lovely bite on my cheek).  Since allergy medicine makes me sleepy, I think I'll just rest tonight.  I think that these are the same allergy problems I had right before I moved, which make me think that they're a combination of stress and environmental stuff like trees, etc.

But today, I'm going to the big grocery store and I'm going to try to check out the yarn store that's nearby.  If that doesn't take me too long I might also go to the home store nearby to try to get some sheets and something with color for my apartment.

I'm a little stressed about cooking here.  I'm still having a pretty hard time finding ingredients to make things that I cook at home.  I'm going to try to go through the grocery store slowly today to find what I need and want.  Hopefully, I'll find some new things and be able to make things that aren't variations on lemon/caper/olive sauce + meat/fish/pasta.

I also really need to find a shopping cart/bag that will make it easier to schlep all of my stuff home from the grocery store.  It's really the only time I miss having a car here!

Success!

I left my house at around 8:30 this morning and made it to work before 10.  I walked about a mile and a half to the bank and spent the whole time practicing conversation for the bank.  I practiced saying, "The ATM took my card.  A woman at my job told me to come here and get a new one" in Spanish.  I practiced saying, "Also, I wrote the wrong signature on the website and I got locked out of my online account!  Can you unblock it for me?" 

I got there and everyone was pretty busy, but I finally got a guy to help me.  I asked if he (or anyone there) spoke English and told him my Spanish was terrible - but no luck there.  I launched into my spiel about the ATM card and he asked if it was a machine in that place that took my card. And here was the real test.  I had to say things I hadn't practiced.  I told him that the woman at my job had called them, and they told her that they would have the card for me.  So, he went into an office and voila!  My card!  It was the actual card that the ATM had eaten with my signature and everything.  We tested it to make sure it worked and it does.  The guy asked me if I needed the ATM translated to English, but then said my Spanish was good enough he thought I would be okay in Castellano.  So now I do all my transactions in Spanish ... I can always change it later if it's too hard. 

Then we moved on to the internet issue - he fixed everything for me there and we tested the key (though not the signature - so hopefully that works).  I had a good combination of Spanish I had practiced and improv Spanish, but he understood everything I needed and was very helpful.

I honestly feel like if I can do this, I can do almost any face to face interaction.  I think the phone would be way harder, because it's harder to understand in both directions.  Fortunately, they're not huge on phone based customer service here, so I should be able to survive.  Overall, I'm feeling so much better about the whole language barrier/culture shock issue.

I am not very good at patience or at making mistakes, and my time here so far has tested both of those things pretty substantially.  Today demonstrated to me that I need to be more patient with myself (a constant struggle) and to be willing to make mistakes.  In a weird way, if I hadn't totally misunderstood the entire banking system here, I wouldn't have had a chance to practice my Spanish today.  While I was practicing my Spanish, I know I made about 4 billion mistakes, but I survived.  No one yelled at me or laughed at me and the guy understood everything I needed.  So, the next time I need to practice, I'll be a little less scared.  And maybe I'll leave this whole experience actually speaking real Spanish - which was one of my big goals anyhow.

Between this excitement and all of the exciting things getting started at work, today is one of the days when I feel like "I can do this!"  I'm sure I'll have more "What am I DOING here?!?" days, but it's nice to feel like I might be able to succeed!

Wish me luck ...

I got bitten by twice by a (or multiple?) mosquitos last night.  I just killed a mosquito that was buzzing around my place, and it squirted tons of blood all over my hands.  Probably my blood.  Jerk mosquito.

And I woke up super, duper nervous about the bank.  This does not bode well for my ability to actually say things in Spanish while I'm there.  That's what a dictionary is for, I guess.  I need to just go be a grown up about it.  Wish me luck!

Like Magic

Today was magically much, much better than yesterday.  I had a great day at work and started to figure things out more in terms of logistics.  One of my new friends taught me how to load my bus card with tickets - I chose the monthly ticket since you only have to ride the bus 44 times to pay for it - and if I go to work and back every day for a month, I will ride it 40 times, so I think it's definitely going to be worth it.

I'm also planning to go to the bank tomorrow to pick up my replacement ATM card and hopefully get "unlocked" from my online bank account.  I have been practicing the things to say, though I'm pretty nervous about the whole ordeal.  I know I'll survive either way, and if I need to I can always drag a Spanish speaker with me on Monday.  It will be really good for me to at least try, I think.

Tomorrow's going to be a short work day:  a late morning due to the bank (they're only open 9-1:30), and an early afternoon since another postdoc is leaving and we're all going out for pintxos/drinks at around 6 downtown (and I want to go home and drop my things off before we run around town for who knows how many hours).

I don't have plans for this weekend after tomorrow night, but hopefully, I can make some!  Otherwise, I might just try to get lots of work done.  I'm submitting to two conferences, and would like to have some new data to present!  I do need to go to the big grocery store as well as go to the "home" store to try to buy some sheets and something not beige for my place.

Better day already ...

It's only 8:20 but I know today is going to be a better day - I feel more awake already than I did all day yesterday.  The weather is supposed to be clearer 'til the evening.  I'm going to get home in time to go to the grocery store.  A friend of mine is showing me how to put money on the bus pass.  And I won't suck in Spanish today, since I've already practiced some this morning.  :)  Plus, I'm wearing pink which always means I have a good day.  I do, however, feel like I need to find some good music to work to - if you have any suggestions, feel free to leave them in the comments (click on the "0 comment" link below and it should let you comment)!

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Once again, I forgot to hit "post".  But it's okay because I had something else to say!

The busses here have televisions on them which show ads, where the next stop is, relevant information about the town ... they show where the "farmacias de guardia" are (all pharmacies keep Spanish time - except for one or two in each town which stay open for 24 hour.  This responsibility rotates among the pharmacies - and it's posted on all the closed pharmacies where the nearest open one is.  This is important since you can't even buy tylenol outside of a pharmacy here - and all medicine is behind the counter).  Anyhow, I can't believe I didn't mention my favorite thing, which is that the bus televisions have birth announcements for all of the babies born in the last 24 hours.  How cool is that?  Yesterday four kids were born, so far as I could tell on the tv - two Xabiers among them (pronounced "shah-bee-air").  I feel like every little boy I see here is called Xabier, which I sort of love because the nickname is "Xabi" (Shah-bee).  Too cute.

Update

As if this day weren't already enough, I ran out to the grocery store to get some flour and maybe some fresh bread so I could cook a recipe and they're closed.  They're not supposed to close 'til 9, but they're closed.  I'm getting tired of not being able to find the ingredients I want and not really being able to cook.  There are only so many variations on "lemon chicken" and "fish with lemon sauce" that I can make.  Boo to Spanish grocery stores today!