Sad

At Christmas Eve Mass, Father Rick started his homily by singing "Prepare Ye the Way of the Lord" from Godspell.

All of a sudden, in the middle of the church, I was tearing up.  The memory struck me the way they do on TV shows.  You close your eyes and flash back to the moment that you first heard something or first did something, and your senses are overwhelmed by remembering things exactly as they were.

When I was a junior in high school, I was in our school musical, Godspell.  I loved theatre ... not as much as I loved violin, but I really, really loved to sing.  And I loved to perform, and I loved to hang out with my friends.  And Godspell was this perfect storm of everything I loved.  Every rehearsal, I loved that show.  I was insanely busy then - the same weekend of the show was the state competition for another group I was in (Future Problem Solving - long story).  We finished the show one night, we drove to Ann Arbor at the crack of dawn the next day, competed, and I came home for the show that night.  It turns out we did well in the competition, placing in the state for the first (and only time) in my 8 years of competing.  I was competing in a million things, taking a thousand lessons, and while I loved it all, that show was like a little haven.  It wasn't the only show I did in high school, but it was easily my favorite.  I got to sing the best song in the show which ended with incredibly high notes that lasted forever.  I got to play a number of silly, funny, and beautiful characters.  I loved it.

I always thought of theatre as a side project in my life, but Godspell takes up a big piece of the forefront of my high school memories.  I remember working on the sets and costumes.  I remember exactly what I wore in that show and how great it felt to wear the costume every night.  I remember climbing the onstage scaffolding at the end of my song and standing over everyone's heads as I got to sing with pure joy.  I remember losing my voice for our last performance and whispering almost everything until I got to my solo, in hopes of having some voice remaining.  I remember all the words to all the songs, and a fair bit of the dialog too.  More than any other play or musical, this one made a mark on me that has yet to fade 12 years later.

Our director always wanted me to do more theatre, but theatre took up a lot of time and was hard to do in conjunction with everything else I did.  He wasn't always the easiest person to work for because he demanded a lot from us, but he led us in what always ended up being joyful experiences.

Today, he passed away unexpectedly.  The news hit me harder than I would have guessed it would.  And, since I'm pretty sure I never told him thank you for all of the joy he let us experience singing, dancing and playing on stage, I figured I would say it here:

Thank you, thank you, thank you for giving me those opportunities, those chances to do something I truly loved to do.  Thank you for teaching me well.  I really, really appreciate it.